"And? What of it?"
I still didn't see the point of making me sit through that. Sure, I could tell that they were Babylon's memories and an important part of what made her what she was now, but it didn't seem to be connected to the situation at hand in any way, shape, or form.
Though it wasn't a complete waste of time, it wasn't particularly interesting, either. It barely made me feel a thing.
Babylon probably felt the same way. Assuming she saw it, too, it was likely nothing more than a poke on an old wound for her. And she definitely wasn't weak enough to be broken by that.
A woman who was ready to sell her soul to the Devil wouldn't be daunted by a glimpse of her dark side.
That was why I...
"Ah, wait... The 'dark side,' eh...? I see. Then, this is..."
As I expected the meaning behind the vision, the darkness was removed once more.
"Forgive me, for I have sinned
Borne of loyalty, your will I once defied."
I saw a woman, repenting while holding up her blade in reverence.
First came the darkness of Babylon's soul, and now it was Beatrice's turn.
"Forgive me, for I am naught but a fool, never your equal.
Let your crimson pyres have their fill."
These were the memories from when she accepted the Mercury's words and became a knight of the Longinus Dreizehn Orden. The only thing whirling in her heart was regret and motivation.
It was all made visual and became a film for me to watch.
"Why are you smiling?"
The place was a simplistic field hospital. And Beatrice was sitting on a chair next to a bed within it. A woman on the bed stared at her with fiery eyes.
It was Samiel. No two ways about it — these were memories from the time she got those burns.
It was the year 1942 — about two years back. Specifically, the day when the news of Lord Heydrich's assassination began to spread.
Of course, that was just misinformation, and I didn't believe it for a second. However, I'd be lying if I said that it didn't shake me.
These two weren't all that different in that regard.
These two weren't all that different in that regard.
"I still don't know whether I really smiled back then. Upon hearing of Lord Heydrich's death, the Major uncharacteristically made a fatal mistake in battle and ended up incapacitated. Though her life was saved, her future as a soldier was completely undone. No — there was more to it. The burns covering half of her body killed the woman known as Eleonore von Wittenberg. She'd become hard to look at and was no longer my superior. It definitely wasn't a situation to smile about. But for some reason... No, wait, I just spoke it myself."
"Are you happy, Kircheisen?"
"Happy? Yes, actually. This moment brought me relief. I felt that this incident saved us both — that it gave us an opportunity to return to where we belonged. The war was going horribly, and it could spell the end of our Fatherland. Our families, friends, and ourselves were in danger of injury or death. But even so, I felt saved. After all, this day, we were done as people. No matter how much misfortune we were met with, none of it was beyond the world I could understand."
Basically, hearing of the Gold's death had made her feel the exact opposite of Samiel, who was overcome with despair.
The regret that festered within her due to that sentiment shaped her into what she was now.
"So... Lord Heydrich is dead."
Her words were stiff, and it was hard to tell whether she was crying or laughing.
The next moment, Samiel hit Beatrice's head with a nearby flower base.
"Get out...! I never want to see you again!"
"Major..."
"Get out! Right now! I'll kill you! Don't show your face to me ever again!"
Following her bellowing, she collapsed and started groaning while huffing like a beast.
Beatrice watched as Eleonore tore into the sheets so hard that her half-melted fingernails came off. Then, Beatrice stood up.
"I'll bring a new vase."
She wanted to bring Samiel flowers and stay with her no matter how many times her superior hit her. That was all she could do, and she felt like it was something she absolutely had to do.
There was nothing else in her at that moment, and it made her feel free for the first time in years.
At least in terms of the worldview she so wanted to believe in, anyway.
"The war would go on. People would still die. The chain of tragedy would continue until the Fatherland's defeat, and perhaps even long after that. For me and the Major, however, the battle was over. We avoided my greatest fear — the future where we were consumed by the Gold's light and became something inhuman. All that was left for us was to continue like any soldier would and merely accept our fate. It was simple. Nothing about it was complex. Being foolish enough to ever believe that... Is my greatest regret."
She wasn't wrong there. Beatrice was acting really damn stupid.
She had no way of knowing this, but a moment after Beatrice left, Samiel was visited by none other than the Gold Himself, alive and well.
"No need to hide your form. These scars are nothing to be ashamed of. You are more beautiful than ever, I say. Come with me, Major. Both of us have a death to our name, after all."
"Yes... Yes...! I will follow you forevermore!"
So, in the end, the only idiot was Beatrice. She couldn't bear the reality and escaped to a comforting delusion.
Really, how stupid can you get? I mean, there was just no way Lord Heydrich could die.
Ignoring reality to protect her own little world made her a real failure as a soldier — a fact that weighted heavy on her.
If you ask me, even if Beatrice stayed by Samiel's side and didn't leave for even a second, the end result wouldn't have changed.
"The reality of my failure would still be there, after all. I would still be a hopeless fool. The regret would still torture me. I deeply wish to regain what I lost."
"Indeed. That craving is now your ultimate truth."
Another storm of static, followed by a magician's curse — or blessing.
"You pursue a soul that shines bright and leave nothing but death in your wake. You are a reaper that summons the champions of battle into Valhalla — the being most suited to be Gladsheimr's vanguard. To celebrate your nature, allow me to title you 'Valkyria' — the battle maiden who speeds through war-scorched lands like lightning."
Beatrice clenched her teeth in disgrace, thoroughly denying her alias.
"I wish to become a light that illuminates the path."
She embraced her blade and promised to continue being human, no matter how deep in the sea of mercury she sunk.
"...I see how it is."
The film vanished, leaving nothing but the darkness. Once again, the situation hadn't changed at all.
From what I could tell, this place was all about "darkness" as a concept. It included the dark sides of human hearts and souls, and being here made them materialize before you.
In that case, it was actually a pretty good defense mechanism. The invaders probably couldn't leave this place until they faced and defeated the darkness within.
It was too indirect for my tastes, but I couldn't deny that it was bothersome. After all, there wasn't a single person in the world without a dark side.
Not to mention that — assuming I was right about having to face the darkness — there was no way to tell what, exactly, you had to do. And even if I had a means of getting rid of my dark side, there was the question of if going through with it would alter me somehow.
After all, the memories I'd saw just now were important parts of who Babylon and Beatrice were as people. Taking them out would be the equivalent of removing your spine — you'd just crumble to the ground.
With that in mind, I had to come up with a way to remove this darkness.
"What a fucking bother. This is all too philosophical for me."
It was definitely very magician-like, though. Malleus would probably have made short work of the barrier, but since she wasn't there, I had to do something myself.
There was only one real option for me.
"Come on, then. Bring it on."
First and foremost, I had to see what my darkness actually was.
"Oh my. But it's oh-so-simple."
What I saw was a woman, standing in a garden of crimson roses.
With a wide, broken smile on her face, she bathed in a fountain of blood. I knew that insane expression all too well.
The unnatural passion shining endlessly in her crimson eyes made me click my tongue.
"Tch..."
I wasn't amused by the sight whatsoever. Preparing for her to get on my nerves, I made a point to speak as bluntly as possible.
"Well, if ain't it Helga."
"Oh, yes. It's been so long since we faced one another like this. It makes me so happy. How long has it been since you made love to me? Even if it was years ago, I remember like it was yesterday. Are you eating properly? Do you have a cold? Were you lonely without me? Hey, come here and hug me like you used to."
"Shut the fuck up."
I wasn't into the idea of wasting time listening to some demented hag talk, so I raised a finger and made myself clear.
"Let's make this simple. I'm gonna ask you something and you'll just answer. If you start spouting shit I don't care about, I'll..."
"Kill me? Then I'll do just that. After all, I..."
Cutting her words short, I punched Helga in the face. Her silhouette scattered into pieces, accompanied by the sound of a bursting water balloon.
"Eheh, eheheheh... There. That's exactly it. I love it when you do that to me. Wil, oh Wil, my beloved son. Make a mess out of me! Love me until I break!"
"..."
She stood up from the puddle of blood I reduced her to, regaining her form in the process. It seemed not even turning her to dust could make her disappear.
I more or less expected it, so I wasn't surprised, but it sure as hell pissed me off. Bitch annoyed me to no end, I swear.
"So, you're my darkness, huh?"
"Yes. Certainly. Of course I am. What else could it be? I'm the memory that's hardest for you to get rid of, aren't I? I am your strongest bond — your flesh and blood."
Her form wriggled like an amoeba as her corrupted, blood-stained eyes took a crescent shape. I could see a red fang peeking out of her grinning mouth.
"Big words, coming from a bitch who's been in the ground for years. I took good care of our blood bond when I offed you, didn't I?"
"Oh really? Then why am I still inside you? My lovely Wil. My dear vampire pretender Wil. You just can't accept the reality that you were born from me. So you broke it. My roots, return to ash, and all that."
Yeah, I cut away the curse of my origin. That was a truth I had confidence in.
I mean, who'd ever accept that a filthy crow gave birth to a phoenix? I had to right that wrong — to break that idea and be reborn.
"And yet... Eheh, eheheheh... And yet we're still connected. This isn't a bond you can break, dear Wil. We're family, after all. And you still fondly remember the day you made love to me. You simply don't wish to forget it. You never have. And that's why I won't forget it, either. I won't disappear as long as I remain in your memory. As long as you wish to violently break me, embrace me, and drain me dry... We'll be together forever, Wilhelm. That is the Dark Gift that binds us."
"Shut up."
"No need to be shy. Be yourself. You want to suck your mother's blood, don't you? Oh my, what a spoiled boy you are."
"I told you to shut the fuck up."
I threw another punch. It reduced her to a bloody mist, but even that wasn't enough to stop her from talking. Her voice resounded all around me.
"Kyahahaha! Ahahahahahahah! I love you, Wilhelm! Crave me. Look at no one else but me! I'm all you need! After all, I am the only one..."
With both ridicule and affection in her tone, Helga imparted those cursed words upon me.
"I am the only thing you will ever have."
"Fuck off!"
The moment I roared...
"Wilhelm...?"
"...!"
...the darkness disappeared with a sound like the ebbing of a tide.
"Huh...?"
No, It didn't disappear — it escaped.
"Mice...? And bats?"
There were so many such animals that "thousands" seemed like an understatement. The dark-loving creatures retreated like an avalanche.
It was safe to assume they were what comprised the darkness I was just in. The swarming horde of little animals made me feel slightly disgusted, but that didn't really matter given the situation.
"Why...?"
What mattered was the question of why they were scattering. I hadn't done anything to make it happen.
Nothing in my face-off with Helga could be described as me "dealing with my dark side." All I did was tell her to fuck off, but if that was enough, then this wouldn't have been a problem for anyone.
"Not liking this one bit. It's like they're looking down on me."
All I knew was that I wasn't the one who took care of my problem. I found that degrading, since I wasn't the "All's well that ends well" type of man.
With that in mind, I stood in place and considered the situation just so I could feel that I passed the challenge by myself.
"I haven't forgotten Helga, huh? And that's the proof we're still bound or some shit, eh?"
Well, it was definitely true that I hadn't forgotten her. Back then, it had only been fifteen or sixteen years since I'd killed her, and my memory wasn't convenient enough to just let me delete the event or anything.
Did the fact that I remembered her mean I love her? No fucking way. It's normal to remember the people you fucked in the past. You might lose all attachment to them, but you won't just forget.
"Then what? Is it because I see her as special or something?Fuck off with that bullshit. I won't deny it, but it's a different kind of 'special.'"
Helga left an impression on me because she was my first woman. Sure, that made her special, but she was a memento, at most. A mere trophy.
Anyone who tried to find "bonds" or "love" in that had a few screws loose, I tell ya. It was the stupid, pathetic babbling you'd expect from someone who was braindead.
Obviously, I had no ear for such bullshit, so I concluded that I would've won the argument even if it wasn't cut short.
"You're not the only one, you dumb bitch. Don't get conceited. Fucking watch me. Your little rose garden will soon be full of trophies just like you."
After I said that, my vision grew completely clear.
The first thing I saw...
"..."
...was Claudia.
"...So this is where you were."
We were at the deepest part of the cavern, in a room that seemed like a burial chamber. Claudia was lying on the floor, completely unconscious and looking like the careless idiot that she was.
The idea that I had to deal with that bothersome bullshit while she was sleeping soundly made me both feel tired and slightly pissed.
"Hey. Hey, wake up, you dumbass."
I poked her with my foot, but the only response she gave me were light groans. I prepared to try and wake her up with a stronger kick, but...
"Huh? This is the..."
...an envelope fell out from my uniform.
It was the same one I'd gotten from Samiel. I'd completely forgotten its existence, but being surrounded by all those bats probably messed up my clothes and loosened it.
I considered just throwing it away right then and there, but seeing it at that moment made me somewhat curious.
"...Tch. Fuck, let's just see..."
I mumbled, picked it up, opened it, took out the document inside, and began reading it.
"...What?"
The content made me doubt my eyes.
And the shock didn't end there.
"Who are you?"
"..."
I heard him behind me. He was close enough for me to feel his breath. Not only that, but I felt something blade-like poking into my back.