The **Salt Mines of Sorrow** stretched endlessly—a crystalline wasteland where even black holes wept. Leon jabbed his divine broom into the salt, igniting sparks. "System, scan for mom's trail."
*"Ding! Detecting emotional residue. Suggested tool: [Teardrop Pickaxe] (Crafted from 100% genuine tragedy)."*
Ignisia grimaced, her dragon scales crusted with salt. "Why does everything here taste like *regret*?"
"Because it's mined from broken dreams," Leon said, tossing her a **[Nostalgia Filter Mask]**. "Put this on. The air's 80% unresolved daddy issues."
Suddenly, holographic billboards lit up the gloom:
**"CRYING CONTEST LIVE! NFTs of YOUR TEARS SOLD HERE!**
**1st Prize: Eternal Melancholy (Tax-Deductible!)**
A familiar platinum-scaled figure dominated the leaderboard—Lady Ledger, sobbing dramatically into a ledger. "**My ex-husband optimized our love into a spreadsheet!**"
"She's winning?" Ignisia gagged. "This is why dragons avoid marriage."
---
**System Mandate**:
*"Ding! Tear Harvest Quest:
1. Win the crying contest (Method: Embarrassing childhood stories).
2. Mint tears into [Soulful NFT].
Reward: [Salt Mine Map Fragment].
Penalty: Your first crush's diary becomes public domain."*
Leon groaned. "Fine. Let's traumatize the cosmos."
---
**Contest Highlights**:
- **Leon's Entry**:
"When I was 8, I tried to season a volcano with mom's hot sauce… and burned off my eyebrows."
*Result*: Gods donated 500k tears. NFT titled **"Spicy Childhood Trauma"** sold instantly.
- **Ignisia's Forced Entry**:
"I once accidentally sneezed and incinerated a kingdom. They wrote ballads called *'The Snot Heard Across Realms'*."
*Result*: Black holes wheezed. NFT **"Dragon Booger Apocalypse"** trended on TikTok.
- **Lady Ledger's Counterattack**:
"He promised me tax exemptions for eternity… then claimed our marriage was a *'temporary write-off'*!"
*Result*: Cosmic auditors wept. Her NFT **"Love is a Liability"** crashed the crypto market.
---
**Plot Twist**:
As Leon collected his prize—a salt shaker labeled **"Mom's Coordinates"**—the ground exploded. A woman emerged, her skin shimmering with chemical frost.
"**You dare dig up her legacy?**" The Preservative Goddess hissed, her breath reeking of formaldehyde. "I banished her here for corrupting **Eternal Flavor** with… *feelings*!"
Leon's broom hummed. "You're the one who jailed my mom?"
"**She made the cosmos crave imperfection!**" The goddess launched **Expiration Beams**, aging everything they touched. Ignisia's scales cracked like stale bread.
"System!" Leon ducked behind a salt pillar. "What's her weakness?!"
*"Ding! Target Profile:
- **Name**: Preservative Goddess (Expiry Date: ∞)
- **Achilles' Heel**: Authentic human tears (Best before: NOW)."*
Leon grinned. "Time to get *emotional*."
---
**Climactic Battle**:
1. **Phase 1**: Leon hurls **NFT Tear Grenades**—each sob unleashing a memory tsunami.
2. **Phase 2**: Ignisia eats a **Sadness Croissant**, firing melancholy breath (turns goddess's minions into emo poets).
3. **Finale**: Leon activates mom's sauce jar. The Preservative Goddess screams as **"Unfiltered Love"** melts her chemical armor.
"**NO!**" She disintegrated into a sticky puddle labeled *"Contains 0% Authenticity"*.
---
**Revelation**:
The jar glowed, projecting mom's message:
*"Leon, find the **Recipe Fragments**. They're keys to rebooting the cosmic flavor… and my freedom."*
The System pinged:
*"Ding! Salt Mine Map Updated. Next Fragment: **Bitterroot Jungle** (Warning: Inhabited by decaf barbarians)."*