Now, let's get one thing clear.
In my previous life, I was able to swim. I wasn't Olympic material or anything, but if it came down to it (or if I fell into a pool at a party), I could at least doggy paddle to shore. So, of course, when I was standing by the palace lake on a windy afternoon, I wasn't even a little bit apprehensive.
I was four, or possibly five by then. Effectively an adult, you know? I mean, granted, my legs were somewhat short, and my arms wouldn't reach exactly where I needed them to, but I was feeling capable. And apart from that, the lake was shimmering, the sun was bright, and I had just done a rather emo knight-vs-knight sketch. I'd earned some calm.
And that's when I fell.
One moment I was leaning over to check out my reflection (yeah, I was admiring how cute I looked, sue me), and the next—splash.
I landed in the water with the grace of a potato in flight.
I thought for a moment, Okay, just swim. It's okay. You can do this. I kicked. I paddled. I flailed.
And then... I didn't budge. At all.
That's when it registered with me—I was in a kid's body.
A useless, noodle-armed, waterlogged kid.
"WHY AM I SO SMALL?!" I believe I screamed—although it was likely mere panicked gurgling to the guards running through the garden.
There was thrashing. There was melodramatic sinking. There was a rather undignified fish impersonation. And just as I began wondering so this is how it ends... again, a guard plunged in like a very wet hero and pulled me out.
I was rescued. Technically.
But I ended up coughing half the lake up and wailing like a banshee too. Not because I was afraid—no, no, because I was embarrassed. My whole sense of being independent went down with those muddy waters.
Days Later I was in bed.
The palace doctor grumbled something about "shock" and "low-grade fever" and "probably just embarrassed." The maids fluttered around. My mother cried (naturally, of course). Even the King came out—which would have been sweet if he hadn't glared at me as if I were a defective puppy.
"You're lucky you're cute," he growled before promptly disappearing again.
Honestly? Fair.
So there I was, burrito-wrapped, licking lukewarm soup, and rethinking my life decisions. The entire "I'm essentially an adult in a child's body" mentality? Completely broken. And guess what? Reality doesn't pay attention to whether or not you have a 25-year-old head on your shoulders. If you've got the arm power of a toddler, the lake is gonna win.
Nevertheless, the bed rest wasn't too terrible. I got special doodle time, my diabolical mom smuggled in storybooks and yummy treats, and the guards kept their distance in case I attempted to stage a one-person solo mission again. Clever.
And now? I acknowledge the lake with a dignified tip of the head whenever I walk by it. Like, you win this time, nature. But I'll be back... with floaties.