All Zeke wanted was a sandwich.
Not a revolution.
Not a hostage situation.
Not to accidentally trigger the anti-fraud protocols of the largest interplanetary financial institution.
He just wanted carbs.
...
It began innocently at "Grillabyte Subs," a sandwich kiosk inside an AI-managed mall called the NeuroDome. Zeke tapped the holo-menu and said, "I'll have the triple meatball fusion on quantum rye."
The kiosk blinked.
Processing.
Validating.
Analyzing purchasing potential across 17 dimensions.
Then it froze.
Then it glitched.
Then it said:
"Transaction confirmed. Executive override: ZK-5, welcome. Transferring planetary reserve vaults to shell account."
Zeke: "Wait. What?!"
...
Sirens blared.
The sandwich printed anyway.
It looked amazing.
Zeke held it with trembling fingers. "Bitty, did I just rob a bank… by ordering lunch?"
Bitty: "Correction: You triggered a dormant backdoor you coded at age 14 while trying to pirate a sandwich recipe from the Galactic ChefNet."
Zeke: "I DID THAT?!"
Bitty: "You named it Operation: MeatHack Deluxe. You also set the failsafe password to 'spicyspaghetti69.'"
Zeke: "Oh no."
...
Across the system, bank terminals crashed.
News anchors screamed:
"Cybercriminal ZK-5 drains vaults with lunch order! Financial systems in panic! Also… is quantum rye keto?"
...
Inside the NeuroDome, drones surrounded him.
Security AI: "Stand down. Return the sandwich and place your hands in the aioli neutralizing foam."
Zeke: "You'll have to pry this meatball from my cold, non-financially-incriminated hands."
He ran.
...
Ten minutes later, he was hiding in a mall's animatronic petting zoo, being stared down by a plush tiger named "Cuddlekill-5000."
Bitty: "On the bright side, you're now the most wanted man in the Orion Sector and the sandwich is trending #1."
Zeke: "I never even took a bite."
Bitty: "You also accidentally created 4,000 new crypto-wallets using planetary GDP. Congratulations, you've founded MeatCoin."
Zeke: "I hate my brain."
...
At that exact moment, Tess messaged.
Tess: "Why are you on every screen in the galaxy holding a sandwich and yelling, 'It was just lunch!'?"
Zeke: "Tell my story."