I was lying in bed, finally feeling a bit better. The fever had dulled into a gentle throb, and for the first time in hours, I could breathe without sounding like a broken harmonica.
And there she was—Erza, the mighty Dragon Queen, known for crushing armies and roasting wyverns with a single breath... now struggling with a spatula in my tiny kitchen.
I watched as she fumbled around, opening cabinets the wrong way, scowling at the microwave like it was an enemy spy. She'd burned three pans, dropped two bowls, and cursed loudly enough to make my neighbor's cat cry.
But still, she didn't give up.
I never thought she'd care this much.
With flour on her cheek and smoke in her hair, she looked like a disaster—but my disaster. My wife.
Eventually, she did the unthinkable. She picked up my phone, squinted at the screen like it was ancient runes, and asked in the most serious tone:
"How do I... Google... meat on rice?"
I almost laughed out loud right then.
Somehow, after following a cooking tutorial with only 12% battery and 0% patience,
I stared in horror as Erza stood proudly in the kitchen, a frying pan in one hand and... raw beef in the other.
"Behold, mortal husband! I shall prepare this 'Gyudon' you always speak of!" she declared, eyes gleaming like she was about to slay a dragon instead of, well... cook.
I gulped. "Erza... do you even know how to—"
BAM!
She slammed the beef into the pan without any oil. Smoke exploded like a battlefield.
"This is fine," she said, completely deadpan, while the meat screamed in agony.
I watched in silent terror as she poured soy sauce... and then half a bag of sugar... and then—for some reason—a pinch of salt with the elegance of a queen.
But she made it.
And she brought it to me like it was a legendary offering.
"Here," she said, placing the bowl on my bedside table with a proud smile. "Breakfast... is served, mortal."
She gently adjusted the damp cloth on my forehead, her hand surprisingly careful against my skin.
"Now open your mouth," she added, scooping a spoonful of her creation like she was feeding a sick baby bird.
I blinked. "Wait. You're... feeding me?"
She narrowed her eyes. "Do not make me say it again."
"…This is kinda cute."
Her cheeks tinted red. "Damn you, mortal. Just eat or I'll burn you alive."
Classic Erza.
I opened my mouth obediently, and she slipped the spoon in.
I chewed slowly.
Honestly… it wasn't bad.
Not great. But definitely edible.
Actually, the fact that it didn't kill me on contact made it a 5-star experience in this household.
Then, out of nowhere, I felt something warm slide down my cheek.
A tear.
I was crying.
Erza's eyes widened. "Is it... that bad?! Should I burn it and start over?!"
"No, no," I said, wiping my face. "It's not that. It's just… I'm happy."
She stared at me like I'd grown a second head.
"I mean it," I continued. "Every time I got sick, I was alone. No one ever really stayed with me. But now… here you are. Scaring my neighbors. Breaking my kitchen. Setting off the smoke alarm. Just for me."
She huffed, clearly flustered. "Uff... you're so dramatic."
I chuckled.
"I'm your wife, idiot. Of course I'll take care of you. Now shut up and eat this."she said.
She scooped another spoonful and shoved it toward my mouth, refusing to look me in the eye.
And in that quiet, awkward, heartfelt moment... I realized something.
Even dragons can be soft.
Just as I was swallowing another heroic bite of Erza's "almost-Gyudon," the door slammed open.
BANG!
"Yuuta!" a familiar voice shouted.
I turned my head just in time to see Fiona—my ex-crush and now very confused friend—storming into my room like she owned the place.
Erza, still holding the spoon mid-air, froze.
Fiona blinked.
I blinked.
Everyone blinked.
"…Are you okay?" Fiona finally asked, her eyes locking onto me—and then to Erza, who was now awkwardly caught mid–"Say aah~" pose with a steaming spoon of questionable rice and meat.
"What in the magical hell is this?" Fiona snapped, hands on hips.
For some reason, Erza looked genuinely shocked — but what really threw me off was that Fiona wasn't scared of her at all. Not even a flinch from Erza's overwhelming aura.
Instead, Fiona stood there, calm... confident.
It didn't make sense.
She shouldn't have gotten this powerful — at least, not this fast. It was supposed to be impossible.
And yet, there she was, standing tall like she owned the world.
Erza didn't flinch. She casually placed the spoon back in the bowl, stood up like a final boss, crossed her arms, and glared.
"Why did you come here, puny human?" she asked coldly, like Fiona had just insulted her ancestors.
Fiona squinted. "Excuse me? I came here to check on my Yuuta."
My spoon clattered to the floor.
"Your what?" Erza's eyebrow twitched so hard I thought it might fly off her face.
I tried to sit up. "Wait—hold on—"
Fiona stepped forward, bold as ever. "You heard me. My Yuuta. I've known him since high school. And now that he's sick, I thought I'd come take care of him."
Erza's magic flared. I could feel the heat rising in the room. The lights flickered. I swore I heard a kettle boil, and we didn't even own one.
"You dare call him your Yuuta?" Erza said with a slow, dangerous smile as she crossed her arms, her gaze sharp enough to cut steel. "You poor, clueless girl… You don't even know—I'm his legal wife."
Her voice echoed with pride, and her chin lifted ever so slightly as if she was looking down from a royal throne. The air around her shimmered with faint magical heat, like a volcano just waking up.
Fiona flinched but didn't back down. "Legal or not, I've known him longer than you've even been on this planet!"
"Ah, but who shares his bed, who made breakfast, and who held the spoon of love today, hmm?" Erza smirked.
"The spoon of—what?!" Fiona looked at me in disbelief.
I let out a small, dying wheeze. "Can… can I not be the prize in your death match?"
The tension thickened. I could already hear imaginary boss battle music building up in the background. Just as I prepared to throw myself out the window to escape—
A tiny voice interrupted.
"Mama. Human sister. Please stop… Papa is sick…"
We all froze. Elena stood there in her pajamas, hugging her stuffed dragon, looking genuinely worried. Her big eyes flicked between both of them like she was about to cry.
Erza immediately deflated, her fire cooling down. Fiona's expression softened too.
"…Fine. For now," Fiona muttered, sitting beside me and handing me a tissue. "But only because the little one asked."
I groaned and leaned back against the headboard. "Seriously, both of you… just give me a moment of peace. I'm sick, not starring in a soap opera."
Fiona stood and adjusted her scarf. "I'll be in the hall. If you need anything, Yuuta… just call, okay?"
I nodded.
She gave me a small, lingering smile—just enough to make things worse—and left the room.
The door clicked shut.
Silence.
Erza turned slowly to me. Her expression?
Like I had cheated on her in her own house.
"You…" she whispered, her voliet eyes narrowing. "You let her sit that close. And smile like that. While you were half-naked under a blanket."
"I—I didn't do anything!" I protested.
"You smiled back."
"I was being polite!"
"You looked at her for longer than three seconds. That's basically emotional betrayal."
"Oh come on, Erza—!"
She turned away, arms crossed again, mumbling something in dragonic that sounded suspiciously like a death curse.
I sighed and laid back down.
"…I swear, being sick in this house might actually kill me faster."
An hour later, the house was quiet… too quiet.
I sat on the bed, eyes half-closed, drifting in and out of a fever nap.
Meanwhile, just outside my bedroom door—two powerful forces faced off like ancient rivals:
Erza and Fiona.
They sat across from each other at the low table in the living room, tea untouched, eyes locked like predator and prey. The air between them crackled.
"You nasty little homewrecker," Erza hissed, her eyes glowing faintly red. "Don't you have a spouse or someone your own species to cling to? How dare you lay your eyes on my husband?"
Fiona rolled her eyes. "Your husband? Please. You probably used some creepy hypnosis spell on him, you manipulative isekai witch."
Erza chuckled darkly. "Coming from a puny flat-chested human who couldn't seduce a rock, that's rich."
Fiona's eyebrow twitched. "Oh, I'd beat your overgrown Fake chest if I were allowed to draw a sword."
Erza leaned forward, mocking her with a grin. "A sword? You can't even use a kitchen knife without slicing your thumb. Don't make me laugh."
Fiona slammed her hand on the table. "At least I didn't come here via truck-kun! Dumb monster probably got hit by a delivery van and lost her memory!"
"I CAME HERE WILLINGLY!" Erza roared, scales flickering along her arms for a second.
"Then go back! If you care about him, leave him to someone who actually understands him!"
"Oh? And that someone is you?!" Erza sneered. "You know nothing about his pain, his sleepless nights, the time I—"
SLAM!
"FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING HOLY," I groaned from the bedroom, dragging the blanket over my face. "You two are like a live-action soap opera—please, let me get five minutes of sleep before I die!"
Silence.
Then Erza mumbled, "He is mine though."
Fiona folded her arms. "Delusional Witch."
I buried my face deeper into the pillow.
"…Just let the fever take me…"
Outside Apartment
The men in black stood outside, watching Yuuta's strange behavior through the window. Their voices were low, heavy with suspicion.
"So I was right... Yuuta Kounari... he can withstand the Ancient Virus," one of them muttered, a spark of curiosity in his voice.
"Interesting," another murmured, eyes narrowing.
The third man, tone grim, asked,
"Boss, do we kill him now?"
Their leader—the boss—remained calm, but there was caution in his words.
"Not yet. We still don't know what he is. For
now, Yuuta Kounari remains a mystery."
As they whispered, a strange weight crushed the air around them—thick, suffocating.
The boss stiffened. His instincts screamed: danger.
"Where's it coming from...?" he hissed, glancing around.
"What is this... pressure?"
One of the men pointed — trembling.
High above, balancing effortlessly atop a street pole, stood a man dressed sharply like a secretary.
He wasn't just standing—he was smiling.
Chuckling.
Whispering to himself:
"Subarashii... Subarashii..."
("Wonderful... Wonderful...")
The black-suited men's faces paled instantly.
One of them snarled, drawing his sword with trembling hands:
"Archdemon!!
How dare you set foot in our city?!"
Guns and enchanted blades were drawn, magic seals activating midair.
But the 'secretary' only laughed louder — a sound that felt like nails scraping against glass.
"What a joke you're sprouting..." he said, wiping a fake tear from his eye.
"And you dare bare your weapons against me?"
BOOM—
The ground trembled as a black-red aura exploded outward, swallowing the street in oppressive darkness.
The three men gasped, choking on fear.
"RUN!!" one screamed.
"He's a High-Ranking Demon!
Tell the Boss!! NOW!!"
But the 'secretary' simply raised a finger.
In the next second—
The three men were hurled into the air, crushed under invisible hands.
Their bodies were squeezed, bones snapping, muscles pulping—until all that remained were small, grotesque marble-sized orbs.
Allen—the Archdemon—chuckled again,.
The Allen dusted his coat lightly, clicking his tongue in mock disappointment.
"Tch. Humans these days... no manners at all.
How dare you even think about touching... my prey."
He turned slowly — his crimson pupil and dark eyes glowing like dying embers — locking onto the small apartment window.
His gaze turned toward the apartment window, where Yuuta Kounari rest—unknowing, fragile... and marked.
Yuuta Kounari.
To be continued..
[Important Announcement!]
Yuuta: (waving at the screen awkwardly)
"Hey, hey, my dearest and only loyal reader! I have some super important news to share with you today!"
(clears throat dramatically)
Yuuta:
"I've officially signed a contract with Webnovel! Woohoo! Sooo... I'll be needing your continued support more than ever! Let's walk this crazy journey together, alright?"
Elena: (tugging his sleeve, tilting her head cutely)
"Papa, papa! Why did you join this 'contract' thingy?"
Yuuta: (chuckling, ruffling her hair)
"Because, sweetheart... Papa also needs money! Gotta feed you and buy ice cream, right?"
Erza: (crossing her arms, smirking coldly)
"Tch. Greedy mortal."
Yuuta: (fake crying dramatically)
"Hey! I'm not greedy! I'm... uh... financially responsible!"
(straightens up proudly)
"And don't worry! I'm not going to lock any chapters until we complete the first major arc! You'll get plenty of story before any locks!"
Elena: (bright smile)
"Yay! Papa's the best!"
Erza: (giving a tiny, rare smile)
"Hmph. Then it's acceptable."
Yuuta: (grinning wide)
"Alright then! That's all for today's important talk!"
(waves at the screen with Elena and Erza standing beside him)
Yuuta, Elena & Erza (together):
"Bye-bye! See you in the next chapter!"