"The Ministry turned it into a damn monument," the Litigator said tersely. Harry instantly wanted to ask about it, but certainly didn't want to ask him right then when it brought out that kind of mood.
"Is there nowhere in the wizarding world you can stay at in the mean time?" Barchoke asked. "Staying with Lester or I would seem rather biased and the muggle world just won't do for us at all."
"Both would work against you," Lester nodded to Harry.
"Well my friend, Ron Weasley, did invite me over to stay-," Harry said, wondering what the Weasleys would say when he showed up with a bedroom set in tow. "But he never said where they live."
"Weasleys?" Barchoke looked to the Litigator. "Er- Um. The name sounds familiar but I don't recall any Account Manager with that folio."
"Probably because there isn't one," Lichfield replied. "I think I know the family he's talking about, they keep popping up on the minimum balance list."
"Oh, that one. Never dealt with them in person."
Harry felt rather embarrassed. He knew Ron's family were poor but hadn't meant to advertise the fact.
"Don't we have a Weasley somewhere," the goblin asked, "or was that a Wesley?"
"No, you're right. There is a Weasley stationed overseas somewhere," Lichfield confirmed. "I heard some of the secretaries talk about him today when he came in for his yearly performance review. Apparently, he's dreamy, " he said wryly. "I slipped out of the office before anyone could ask me to run him through Legals. Want me to have him recalled if he's not here?"
"No, no," Barchoke said with a wave. "That'd raise far too much fuss. Just grab him if you see him."
"It's not going to get him into any trouble, is it?" Harry asked, remembering the last time goblins grabbed anyone around him.
"We're not going to drag him down the hall, if that's what you mean," Lichfield said with a smirk.
"You know, this may work in our favor," the goblin continued, his finger back to his lip in thought. "If we can manage to change this informal invite into a formal rental agreement-"
"First things first," Lester said.
"Oh yes," the goblin said. "You just sign the bottom. Lester can fill out the rest when he goes to find these Weasels."
"Weasleys," Harry corrected.
"Right," the goblin said as Harry signed the form. "Now what we need for you going forward-," the goblin told him, "-is some sort of rental agreement, at least until your next birthday-"
"That can wait," Lichfield said forcefully.
"But it sets up the legal groundwork to counter the youth issue!" cried the exasperated goblin.
"-And it can wait," the Litigator repeated. "The Account Seal comes first since it's the most important. It should have been done the moment I stepped inside this office but some pestilential pixie started pelting me with questions."
Harry looked at him, remembering all the questions he had asked him.
"Not you," Lichfield said, noticing his concern. "Him," he gestured with his thumb. "And if the legal beagle hadn't run off without me I would've had you sign it before signing those other forms."
"Shouldn't that be eagle?" Harry corrected.
"No," Lichfield said with a look to Barchoke. "Because he's small, like a beagle."
The beagle was not amused.
"Then a great stump like you should keep an eye on him," Harry said with a grin. "You know what dogs are like when it comes to trees."
"Ha!" Lichfield cried as Barchoke let off a short round of machine gun like bursts of laughter.
"Stumpy's right," the goblin said. "The Seal should come first."
"So that's a thing now?" Lichfield asked.
"It's better than beagle," Barchoke scorned.
"Would you prefer doxie?"
"I'd prefer to get you all out of my office so I can wonder how this all went so horribly wrong," Barchoke huffed quickly.
"So what does a Seal do?" Harry asked before his brain caught up and he regretted the question.
"ItlockstheAccount, " Barchoke blurted out quickly, before Lichfield could have a field day.
Lichfield eyed them both with a smirk.
"A Seal locks things down so nothing can be done without a bit of blood and magic from you."
"My blood?"
"It's the safest way to do things," Lichfield said offhandedly. "Polyjuice Potion can give a person someone else's appearance, but that just alters their body, it can't alter their blood. The same is true for magic. Someone could cast charms on themselves to make everyone think they're you, but everyone's magic registers differently."
"So it's like a fingerprint?" Harry said, catching on to what he meant.
"Huh," Lichfield grunted, staring down at his thumb. "I never thought they might be different."
"So if a person's blood and magic doesn't match mine then-"
"Then nothing happens," Lichfield continued. "The tellers can't honor cheques, distribute funds, no contracts can be entered into - nothing. We use both because getting one might be possible, getting both would be brobdingnagian."
Harry looked at Barchoke.
"A really really really really really really really big thing to do," the goblin explained.
"And since this guardian signs everything magically-," Harry said, catching on to where he was going.
"Then none of his orders will be any good," Lichfield finished for him. "There'll be silence from our end so they'll have to come here to figure out why it's not being followed."
.....
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