Hanging out with Lilly started to feel a little different after that homecoming date, it was as if we became closer than before. Sometimes we'd skip public speaking class unnoticed just for the sake of being rebellious.
One of the most memorable, and probably most dangerous times, we snuck outside to the 3rd floor balcony and climbed one of the decorative archways. It was a gorgeous view from that high point. We just sat there and watched over the courtyard.
The best part of all is that we were never caught. There was only a few other students that knew how to get to that point, and it remained a secret among Lilly's friends of punks, rockers, and goths. Pretty much most of the kids that were in theater and the stage production crew.
One morning while sitting at those arches high in the sky, we shared some pretty deep conversations. Lilly had a craving for a cigarette, but was surprised when she found out I was a smoker.
"Since when the hell did you smoke?" She looked at me surprised while putting away her lighter.
"Personally or second hand?" I joked as I fiddled to get a cigarette out.
Lilly shrugged. "personally?"
"Umm, probably the 7th grade when I officially sparked my own. My moms a huge chain smoker so I've been exposed to it for as long as I can remember." The match i had started but extinguished prematurely before getting my cigarette. "Fuck! That was my last match."
"Here" Lilly leaned in and had me use her lit cigarette to start mine.
"Hmm?" I was very impressed at this little trick. "Can't say I had a cigarette lit like that before." I took a few drags to get it going. "What about you? When did you start."
Lilly tilted her head back, trying to recall. "6th grade. You remember how my friends were back then?
I started to chuckle as plumes of smoke exhaled. "How can I forget? They were pretty wild."
"Mhmm." Lilly smirked having a feeling of nostalgia. "Well they were the best bad influence I had"
We both started to have a good laugh. Lilly caught sight of a teacher walking across the courtyard. "Shit! Teacher!"
We both layed down quickly. People on ground area couldn't see anyone this high up when staying low like that. We stayed laying and just continued to watch the patches of clouds drifting across the blue skies while we smoked and talked.
Lilly crossed her legs to lounge around. "So why haven't you come out to smoke with us at lunch?"
"Eh." I shrugged. "I usually keep that to myself and just smoke as I'm walking home." I patted the pocket I had my cigerettes in. "Besides, I need to make my cigs last because I steal them from mom."
Lilly started to laugh. "Goofball." She started pointing and shaming me "You're bad for stealing from mom."
"What!" I threw my arms up in the air. "She smokes too much! She probably didn't notice I took a few here and there."
Lilly chuckled and rested her hands on her stomach. "I don't even think my parents know I smoke."
I found myself laying down the same way as if we were both in a therapist session. "Speaking of parents, I never apologized for the awkwardness at the restaurant."
"Yeah what the hell was up with that?"
"I don't know. Dad's been very weird since mom and him started divorcing." I started to get very emotional. There was a pressure in my chest the more I started thinking about it. "Remember that one day when I got pulled out of class by one of the principals?"
"Yeah." Lilly frowned as she recalled that moment. "you came back all teary eyed and pissed off."
My voice was really started to crack and felt like there was a bubble in my throat. "That's because he wanted my sister and I for a paternity test to see if we were really his."
"What!?" Lilly quickly snapped up. "That's fucked. Did you do it?"
"Hell no! Probably the only time I actually told him to fuck off." I sniffled and wiped any tears before they started to become noticable. "Next thing you know, he's trying to be in every part of our lives like he didn't just do that and run out on us." I growled and took a very aggressive hit of my cigarette." Fuckin asshole.
Lilly layed back down and stared up silently. Something I had said triggered a burried emotion of hers. She took a deep hit before speaking anything. "Sounds like my dad."
I looked over at her puzzled. "He seemed alright when I met him."
She shook her head "That's...not my real dad. That's my step dad."
"Oh. I sat up and crossed my legs. "I take it you had a rough past?"
"Not really. My step dad is actually the only dad I've ever known so it wasn't bad." Lilly rolled over onto her side to face me. "My actual father decided to walk out on my mom while she was pregnant with me. I never got to meet him and I hope I never do. He didn't want anything to do with us and I feel the same way about him. Fuck him."
"Hell yeah." I clapped with excitement and support. "Fuck that guy. You're better without him."
Lilly smiled and nodded. She sat up quickly in agreement . "Damn right."
I snuffed my cigarette out after noticing the time. "We better get rolling. Bells about to ring
Lilly laughed "yeah. I don't want to be caught locked out in the balcony like in "Friends."
I cocked my head to the side. "You know, I've Never watched it."
"What!" She exclaimed wildly. "Dude you are missing out."
"How so?"
"I'll tell you what's going on. So there's this guy, Ross...."
As we made our way back into the halls casually like we didn't skip class, Lilly was explaining all about the characters and memorable moments of the show. I started to become interested and she said she would call me the next time it was on.
Sure enough, she did exactly that.
**Phone rings**
"Hello?" I answered knowing it was Lilly from the caller ID
"Goofball. It's Thursday. Friends is on!"
Every week it had become our own little ritual watch party. Always the same greeting from Lilly.
"Goofball. It's Thursday. Friends is on!"
I'd scramble around to find the right channel. And we would just have our own commentary while watching
Lilly: "Phoebe is such a ditz. I love her." She laughed
Alfie: "Yeah. I do like her. My question is what the hell did Rachel see in Ross? Dudes such a tool."
Lilly: "I KNOW RIGHT! She's to good for him."
After the show, we would talk about whatever. What had really interested me was that Lilly had a very broad knowledge of the different genres of music. She would have me listen to some songs over the phone and ask my opinions.
Alfie: "Just how many CDs do you have?"
Lilly: "A few binders full. And more to come. Just picked up the new Incubus album."
Alfie: "Is that the one that has the Drive song?"
Lilly: "Yup."
Alfie: "Aww. Can I borrow it? I love that song"
Lilly:"I'll burn it for you."
Alfie:"Why are you going to burn it? Didn't you just get it?
Lilly: "Seriously?"
Alfie: "Yeah seriously. Why are you going to burn it?"
Lilly: "Goofball." She just started to laugh. "What that means is I'll copy a CD for you."
Alfie:"You can do that now?"
Lilly: "Uhhh, yeah. Where have you been? Don't you have a computer?"
Alfie: "No. The most high tech thing I have is a PlayStation."
Lilly: "God. No wonder you're behind "
Alfie: "Bite me!"
Lilly: "Hahahaha."
Alfie: "So you are telling me you can now make copies on a CD instead of spending time making cassettes like I have been for God knows how long"
Lilly:"I tell you what. I'll make you a few mixes."
Alfie: "Good idea. Preserve before all the computers crap out. You know, with the Y2K bug and all."
Lilly: "Pfft. Goofball."
Alfie: "Anyways, I'm gonna let you go. I'm gonna attempt to do homework I'm always avoiding. Goodnight. See you in the morning."
Lilly: "goodnight, Alfie."
The archway in the balcony even became a regular meeting place whenever we just wanted to share deep conversations and vent.
"Did you ever date anyone?" I casually asked becoming very curious in her dating life.
She let out a plume of smoke before answering. "Ooh boy. Yeah. I've had a few boyfriends. You?"
I shook my head and took a drag of the cigarette. "None. Just crushes. I'm too damn shy to ask." I never revealed to Lilly she was one of them.
Did you ever ask any of them out?
Just one and that was probably the last time I ever attempted. she said EWW"
Lilly choked on her cigarette and stared laughing. "DAMN! That was harsh."
"Yeah. That bitch." I laughed and took another drag. "That definitely made me withdraw like no other. That's why I say I'm probably going to become a monk and be chanting in some far away temple."
"And here you are hanging out with someone unholy and blasphemous." She flicked the cigarette butt.
I made a whistling sound like a bomb being dropped and even added the boom when the cigarette butt hit the ground. "We should probably go back before we get caught."
Lilly climbed down first and retrieved her backpack. She waited on me to finish the descent. "Oh. I brought you a few CDs to take. It's got a lot of Trip Hop." She passed me a few CDs in a paper sleeve.
"Trip hop?" This genre sounded very odd to me. "Name sounds funny. Any big names I might know?"
She shrugged her shoulders "Sneaker Pimps?"
I raised my eyebrows at their peculiar name "I like that name. I'll let you know what I think. I'm going to be blasting this during lunch."
"Yeah yeah. Go have fun playing "magic the gathering with the nerds." Lilly shook her head. "I'll call you later, goofball"
We parted ways by giving each other a one finger salute using the middle finger. It became our signature good-bye wave.