I fixed myself — I was ready for Grade 10, the best and most unexpected school year of my life.
When I entered the school, my heart was pounding. My classroom was on the third floor. I looked over the railings and saw a beautiful view. But what really surprised me — and made me genuinely happy — was seeing that our class adviser this year was the same one I had back in Grade 8. That made me feel a bit more at ease.
The first day started, and there she was again — still beautiful. It's like my eyes were tidally locked on her. I was honestly amazed.
Two new students were moved into our section, and one of my friends quickly befriended one of them. Why? You ask? No? Oh, okay.
There were some new teachers too, but a few familiar ones returned.
Then came the day when we had to choose a club. I joined the choir club, thinking it would be a chill experience. What none of us expected was Mae auditioning too. And when she sang… her voice was angelic. Seriously. Everyone was stunned.
After our audition, we were walking back to our classroom, just chatting, when Mae suddenly said, "You're totally crushing on me, huh?"
I was stunned. My heart was racing, but I tried to keep it cool and just gave her a weird look.
"Dude, what?" I said.
"Just kidding… crushiecakes," she teased, giving me a playful look.
I almost blushed, but I kept a straight, shocked face. Then she added, "This is just a joke, okayyy? Don't take it seriously, hihi :3."
I tried to play it off, acted like I didn't care. But it stuck with me.
One time, during a school event, we went downstairs, and she purposely pressed her body a bit closer to mine — teasing again. I couldn't take it, I felt like I might explode, so I gently pushed her away. She just smiled, cheeky as ever.
Why was she doing this? Was it really all just a joke?
I ignored it and tried to move on.
By the third quarter, we had to draw a snake god for our performance task. I took my time with mine — it wasn't anything crazy, but I'd say it turned out pretty decent. I carefully added scales that matched the snake's position, a warm highlight from the sun, and even included a tribe chief near the bottom to make the scene feel alive.
I finished it and turned it in. Later, Anie came over to the table, picked up my drawing, and showed it to Mae.
"Why is this over the top?" she said.
It felt like they were making fun of it. All the effort I put in — the careful shading, the details — it just felt brushed off. I don't know why it got to me so much, but it did — and I snapped.
"Put it back!" I shouted, louder than I meant to.
Later, I realized I may have overreacted, so I apologized to Anie.
The next day, Mae came up to me.
"Why did you get angry?" she asked.
"It's nothing—" I began, but she cut me off.
"It's okay. Just let it all out."
It might not seem like much, but those words meant a lot to me.
Every time I get mad, people usually just stay silent or say, "Control your emotions," or "That's not good for you." It's always about controlling how I feel.
But Mae... she's different.
That was the first time someone ever told me it's okay to feel things — to just let it out. Maybe that's one of the reasons I fell for her.
To be continued…