Chapter 9: Rest
Sigrid and I stood in front of the fireplace, the stew bubble sitting on the heat. I held her arm firmly, not allowing her to escape.
"You shoudn't be so careless," I murmured, letting my eyes meet hers.
She frowned lightly, her heart rate through the roof, "Please, I'm spoken for, I can't do this." she pleaded, yet no effort in pulling away, maybe she knew she couldn't escape or… she didn't want to escape.
"I can," I said and pushed her against the wall beside the fireplace, tracing her cheek with the back of my finger, slowly reaching her chin, and I lifted it, placing my lips against hers in an instant.
Her eyes widened for a moment, but she melted quicker than last time. Our tongues tangled and swirled in each other's mouths.
Parting from her lips when she became breathless, I glanced at her panting chest and flushed cheeks.
My hand slithered to her belly and her cave, my hand rubbing against her cloth. She moaned, grabbing my arm with both of her hands, her head pulled back, with pleasure visible on her face.
A distant sound—footsteps outside. Alvor's voice, muffled but approaching.
Sigrid's eyes snapped toward the door.
I didn't move back, even as the footsteps outside reached closer and closer. I was enjoying the brewing fear of Sigrid, and as I heard the door creak, I moved to the side, sitting down on the same chair I was sitting in before.
Alvor stepped in, Dorthe following close behind, her hands dusted with soot.
"Smells good in here," he said, glancing between the two of us, oblivious to the moment that had just transpired.
Sigrid forced a smile, her voice trembling just slightly. "Dinner's ready."
I sat back at the table, calm and composed. But I caught Sigrid's eyes one last time before she turned away.
***
After eating dinner, I bid them farewell and headed to Gerdur's. I would've stayed at Sigrid's if the house was empty, I thought, clicking my tongue, slightly annoyed at Alvor's presence.
Knock! Knock!
I stood outside Gerdur's house, leaning against the doorframe. I waited, longer than usual, the door finally swung open reavealing a red eyed Gerdur.
She wiped at her face with her palms, a forced smile on her face. "I thought you wouldn't come back," she muttered.
She stepped aside, letting me in. The fire was low, too lost in her own world, that she forgot to fuel the fire
"I did say I'd be back," I said, stepping inside, watching as she closed the door behind me. "Didn't think you'd still be awake."
She scoffed softly, turning her back to me. "Hard to sleep after the news you gave me."
I didn't reply.
She walked toward the table, standing there like she didn't know what to do with herself. Her hands trembled, not from fear but exhaustion. Her shoulders slumped.
She wiped at her face again, trying to pull herself together, but the weight of the day clung to her like chains. "I've been… thinking."
"About Ralof?"
Her breath caught. Her eyes met mine, red and tired. "Yes. No. I don't even know anymore."
I closed the distance between us, only inches away from her face. She flinched but didn't back away.
"You want to forget," I murmured.
"I want to feel something else," she whispered.
Her lips met mine with no hesitation. This wasn't heated lust—this was something broken and needy. A plea. A search for something to ground her.
I lifted her gently into my arms, letting her bury her face in my neck as I carried her to the bed.
***
I laid her down on the bed gently. Her fingers gripped my shirt as if afraid I'd vanish if she let go.
I climbed over her, feeling the warmth of her fabric against my skin. Her hands moved to my chest, tracing the lines of muscle beneath the fabric, then curling her fingers into it like she needed to hold onto something.
"Make me forget," she whispered.
"I will."
I kissed her again, more deeply this time. There was no hesitation in her—no fear, no second thoughts. Only need. Grief had hollowed her out, and I was here to fill the void.
My hands slid beneath her tunic, feeling her stomach tense under my touch. Her legs shifted, knees parting instinctively. I pulled the fabric off her body, with my ability, watching as her breath quickened, how her chest rose and fell.
"You're even more beautiful when you're honest," I whispered.
She turned her head, eyes closing tight as her hips moved against my hand. "Don't say that…"
"Why not?"
"Because… I'll lose myself."
"Isn't that why I'm here?"
I slid two fingers into her, curling them inside as my thumb rubbed slow circles outside. Her body trembled, breath hitching as I pushed her closer and closer to the edge
She came hard, "Hnn… Ahh… Mmm—!" a broken moan slipping past her lips as her back arched and her thigh clamped around my hand. She shook under me, gasping for breath.
I pulled my hand back and brought my fingers to my lips, tasting her.
"To pull you back," I said, like a rabbit caught in a snare
She looked at me, red-eyed, cheeks flushed, lips trembling. "I'm afraid…" she whispered.
I leaned down, brushing her hair from her face, lips ghosting over her temple. "Of me?"
"No," She shook her head slowly, almost childlike in gesture. "Of what I'll become when you leave."
I paused, letting the silence settle between us like dust in moonlight. Then, softly, "Then don't let me leave."
Her breath hitched again. She didn't respond—not with words—but the way her hands slid up my back, fingers curling tightly, told me everything I needed to know.
I kissed her again, slow, deliberate, like I had all the time in the world. My hands found her thighs and spread them wider, settling between them the heat from her slit driving the last of my restraint away.
I slid into her slowly—carefully—watching her eyes widen.
"Hnn—!" she gasped, back arching.
She clutched at me, nails digging lithly into my skin as her hips shifted. "It feels… strange," she breathed.
I kissed her softly. "I'll go slow."
She nodded, blinking rapidly as her body adjusted, breath coming in small, stuttering moans. "Ahhn… ahh… It's—mmh—"
Her voice broke into small whispers, her face flushed all the way to her ears.
Each movement was gentle, intentional. I rocked into her, letting her feel all of me—ensnaring her. Her moans were quiet, breathly—like she was afraid to be loud.
"Hnng… ohh…" she whimered, her legs shaking as she wrapped them around my waist, drawing me deeper.
Every kiss clumsy but honest. She reacted to everything like it was her first time feeling it.
When I leaned down and took her breast into my mouth, she gasped sharply. "Ahhn! It's too much…"
"It's okay," I murmured against her tit. "You're doing perfect."
She moaned again, softer this time, her hips starting to move without thought, trying to match me. Our rhythm found itself slowly—like a dance we were learning mid-step.
Then she tensed, eyes wide, breath catching as her body clamped around me.
"I—I think I'm…! Hnn—!"
Her climax hit like a wave, her body jerking under me, thighs locking tight, nails digging into my back.
I groaned her name, thrusting deeper as I chased mine, letting go inside her with a grunt, burying my face in her neck as our bodies pressed together in the aftermath.
We stayed like that—breathing hard, skin damp, her trembling hands still holding me like I might disappear.
I was still deep buried in her cave, letting our emission mix, and flow out of her, as i started to pull back—I saw it.
A thin, dark line of red trailed down from where we were connected, catching the faint glow of the firelight.
My brows knit.
Blood?
I blinked, my breath steady, trying to process what I was seeing. Then it clicked. The tension in her body, her inexperience, her stifled sounds, the way she clung to me like she'd never done this before—
She hadn't.
For a moment, I just stared down at her. At her flushed cheeks, her closed eyes, her parted lips that whispered soft breaths of "Ahh…mmh…"
Tch, not the time to feel sorry
I brushed my fingers gently through her hair, my voice low, "Gerdur…"
She blinked up at me, eyes hazy but dazed in that post-release high. "Y-yeah?"
"You've never done this before," I said quietly—not an accusation, not a question.
She looked away, her cheeks growing redder, her lips trembling. "I didn't want to tell you… I thought maybe it'd scare you off."
"Scare me?" I whispered, pressing my forehead to hers. "It only makes me want to hold you tighter." You just made my retribution even sweeter
A flicker of something flashed in her eyes. Relief. Vulnerability. Maybe even affection.
"I was always too focused on surviving. I never found someone I could let in like this."
"You found me," I said, kissing the side of her jaw as I slowly pulled out, careful not to hurt her.
She winced slightly, her hand gripping my arm tighter. A small trail of blood followed, running down her slit.
I reached for the cloth nearby, gently cleaning her, taking my time. Not out of perversion but necessity. She had trusted me, and the least I can do is not hurt her.
As I tucked the blanket around us and pulled her into my arms, she pressed her forehead to my chest, a whisper against my skin.
"Thank you… for being gentle."
I kissed the top of her head. "I'll always be gentle with you, Gerdur… unless you ask me not to."
That earned a tiny laugh through her nose. Her fingers traced circles over my chest as her breathing slowed, and for the first time in what felt like forever, she let herself rest.
I sighed, pressing her closer to me. I glanced at the small wolf, still standing. I wanted to do it again, but I guess not. I looked at the peacefully sleeping Gerdur.
***
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