I'm never going out there again.
I look up, staring at the locker in front of me.
I'm sweating.
And for once.
For once, I feel tired.
I can't explain it.
I really can't.
I don't know how it happened, it shouldn't have happened, at least not like that.
Oh god, my heart is racing.
I took a deep breath.
And another.
And another.
That wasn't normal.
I have sucked life essences as a joke, but it never…never felt like that.
My horns feel so heavy.
I feel as if they are weighing me down as I lean forward.
Why did that happen?
I keep replaying it in my mind.
When he met my eyes.
There was no fear, no nothing.
And it's like something inside me just clicked.
Or shoved.
Or pulled.
And suddenly my heart was beating outside of my chest and in my head.
Oh god.
He should have been out of it for a second, just so I could steal the ball.
He shouldn't have fallen; that wasn't right. That's not what should have happened to him.
And why do I feel..almost full?
That's not the effect life essence should have. It gives you energy.
It doesn't make you tired and instead makes you full.
That's not right.
It can't be.
I heard the door slam open, and I sat up, going to pick up the shirt that I had thrown halfway across the room.
Why do I still feel it?
I still feel that pull.
"How are you feeling, loser? Why were you sitting in here without the lights on?" Vincent teased.
"Leave him alone," Jasper says, and I turn around as he slightly shoves Vincent.
I walked back over to my gym bag and shoved my shirt into the bag.
I sit back down on the bench, and Jasper sits right next to me. "Hey dude, it's fine," he said, slowly rubbing my back.
"You are soaked, that's disgusting," Jasper said, pulling back from me and taking off his shirt.
"Sorry, I have been sweating."
"You don't usually sweat this bad," Jasper said, teasing me.
Who even invited you?
"Baby," Jasper called out.
Dead silent. "Where is he? Whatever. I don't know why you did that to him, Cass is a nice guy."
I rolled my eyes. "I didn't mean to…I was just trying to mess with him."
"By doing that?"
"I didn't know that was going to happen!" I yelled.
"Who the fuck are you yelling at?" here he comes. I sighed. "No one."
Vincent came around and stood in front of Jasper.
And now I am somehow third-wheeling my own problem.
Despite Vincent being my best friend since forever, he will still beat my ass if I even raise my voice at jasper.
Which is crazy because me and him are like the same height.
He acts like Vincent's 3'8 and needs protecting. Bro, that is a full 6'2 man, who could take both of us in a fight.
"Like i did my research and i know he is human and humans react disroeinted when they get their life essences drained, not like they are fucking dying," i mummbled.
"I didn't even know you could do that," Jasper said.
"I didn't know I could either, I think that is why I was scared."
"You scared?" Vincent asked, raising his eyebrow.
"I know, it's crazy." I don't know if I should tell them that my heart was racing when it happened.
That also doesn't happen.
My heart has never raced like that.
"Do…does your…oh god like heart ever race?"
Vincent gave me a weird look. "Did you just ask if our hearts beat?"
"No fucker, i asked does your heart race?"
"Like when I work out?"
"NO! Fuck. like whenever you suck life essence," i mumbled.
"No, that's weird."
I turned to Jasper. "Uh, no, I usually use the bag, and if it's on a human, my heart doesn't race, because I don't have feelings for them."
Feelings.
Gross.
"Okay, so when do both your hearts race?"
"When I see Jasper," gross. "My dick races too."
"I didn't need to know that extra part, but thank you." I turned to Jasper. "What about you?"
"When I see Vincent shirtless," Jasper said with a smile.
WHY AM I THIRD WHEELING MY OWN PROBLEM RIGHT NOW?!!?
Vincent did that weird eyebrow raise at Jasper.
I watched his eyes change colors and his horns slightly grow.
"Okay pack it up buddy, I do not want to see that shit."
"So wait. If my heart was racing when I sucked Cassidy's life essence, what does that mean?"
"I am not sure, actually, because I have never seen a reaction like that before? Do you feel any other emotions?" Jasper asked.
"Not really emotions, more..more like pulling.
"Pulling what?"
"Like, I don't know like this tug, this pull. It's faint. It kind of feels like a small string, I don't know man."
"String?" Jasper looks confused, and then his face morphs into something I can't explain.
I turned to Vincent.
Oh my god, if doesn't stop staring at him.
"I think the pulling mighty be something you have to figure out internally."
"Internally?"
Jasper nodded.
"I remember that feeling," Vincent mumbled.
Now why is everyone being so ominous and vague and why is Vincent stroking Jasper's face like that.
Vincent pulled Jasper to his feet.
There's something about two shirtless buff big horns that's putting me all off right now.
"I remember the day too."
And here comes aristotle with the shits.
"It was 2 years 8 months and 4 days ago." he looked at the clock. "And 4 minutes and 5, 6, 7 seconds."
Him and this crazy ass memory.
"I saw him sitting there with those friends, the friends that despise me to the ends of the earth. We were walking together, Nate and I felt it. I felt that pull."
Oh.
Oh fuck.
But i'm not.
I'm not gay.
"I remember the conversation we were having and the one he and his friends were having too. We were talking about partners funny enough and i told you over and over, i'm not into bighorn girls, they kind of scare me. And you were just telling me the same. They were talking about what food they were having. Jasper wanted to be a food blogger at the time, and had a pretty good following. With 6 posts on it. 2, 378 followers and following 10, those being your friends, your main, your alt and your mom and sister. You're dad refused to get social media so that's why you weren't following him."
Fuck.
Not the crazy tangent.
But i can't remember every single detail.
Let alone a few.
My heart shouldnt be racing.
The pull shouldn't be pulling.
I shouldn't be feeling this way.
I really shouldn't.
"I didn't even see his face. The only thing i don't remember was what he was wearing. I didnt he even see him but somehow heard that conversation. Knew from the bat who he was but I kept walking. And i knew for sure, my heart was racing, my mind was going crazy. And i knew he was my soulmate."
"A soulmate? Bitch are your romeo and juilet, what the fuck are you talking about?"
Vincent kissed Jasper and Jasper sat back down and Vincent sat next to him. "You know how he gets it," Jasper said.
"My muscular big horned soulmate."
"That you keep secrets because you are worried about what other people think."
I think I just heard a pin drop.
I guess that's the dream.
Hiding the one you love.
But is it the dream?
This isn't romeo and juliet.
It really isn't.
Soulmates aren't a real thing.
I think it's all in the heads of the delusional, like the ones next to me.
"You know I was carrying cassidy."
Pull.
Oh god.
Why is my heart racing again?
It's in my head again, it's pounding.
"Why are you breathing heavily?" I watched as Vincent's scary smile emerged on his face. "It's just a name? It's just one stupid name."
Oh fuck.
"Cassidy." pull. "I wonder how Cassidy feels about you." pull.
"Probably thinks your another crazy big horn. Oh but you don't care." i don't care. I don't care about him at all. "You will be in denial until you cant. Even with your heart pounding in your chest about a guy you barely even know? Strange world aint it. Thats what a soulmate is my friend. A soulmate," vincent said.
Soulmates aren't real.
They aren't.
It's literally 2025, soulmates aren't a thing.
They can't be.
He can't be.
He can't be my.
My.
Soulmate.