It took Jenna almost half of the day to get over her shame of lusting over the young man she was supposed to be protecting. Later in the day was when she remembered she had left Mabel all alone and that the poor girl must be scared after what had happened to her.
Getting ready to leave the room, Jenna noticed the hairpin that had the royal family crest on her table. She didn't remember who had given it to her, and she couldn't ask Rhane either, who was the only person she could ask.
Rhane would have a better idea since he had brought her back to the room. Jenna knew people from the royal family all right, but she was two seas away from their kingdom at the moment.
Walking down the hallway to her servant's room, Jenna made a turn and knocked at the door. Harriet was the one to open the door, her face filled with worry.
"What is it?" Jenna asked, peeking inside the room.
Harriet stepped out of the room and closed the door quietly so it wouldn't make a sound. Bringing her hands together, she rubbed them.
"My Lady...it's Mabel...she doesn't think any man will come for her," she whispered. "She tried undressing, but I asked her to wait and trust you."
Jenna looked at the door and sighed. She knew very well what the girl would be feeling. It was like a shame when a lady loses her innocence before marriage. It was a stain that could live with one forever. And the reason it affected Mabel even more was that she left the brothel because she didn't want that life, but now losing that innocence was as if life was telling her she couldn't escape her destiny.
The girl would be devastated no matter how anyone tried to reassure her, and Jenna knew just that. Not that she even had the words to tell her. All she could do was hope a man comes along or even look for the man herself.
"What about you, Harriet?" Jenna turned to look at the girl. "Didn't you see the man?"
Harriet squeezed her hand, moving her head to the side slowly. "We were having a drink, and Mabel decided to go into the crowd and dance. I had a few more drinks with her before leaving...I didn't see Mabel."
Jenna chewed her lower lip. "Send Henri, Bruno, and Percy to me," she instructed.
"What about Rhane?" Harriet asked, stopping in her tracks.
Jenna's heart skipped when she heard the man's name. She wished she could face him without having sinful thoughts about him. Just one look and her body wouldn't be the same; either her core was throbbing or her nipples were aching. And she didn't want any of that.
"Um...not him, leave Rhane. He's new around here," Jenna muttered. "Doesn't know much."
Harriet hesitated for a moment but nodded. The girl ran outside in search of the men, leaving Jenna alone.
Standing outside the room, Jenna could hear soft sobs from inside the room. Mabel was still crying. Jenna pressed her thumb on the knob, bouncing her fingers on it. She was contemplating whether to leave or go inside and at least console the girl.
Making her choice, Jenna turned around to leave the place but then remembered something. All the time she was with her husband, Jenna wished and prayed that someone would come along to save her, take her hand, and even love her where it hurt, but no one ever came.
She walked herself out of that darkness. Now she could also be that hand that will guide another out. Opening the door, Jenna walked into the room. She found the girl kneeling beside her bed and her face buried in the pillow. Her sobs were soft, but Jenna could hear the ache in them.
"Mabel?" Jenna whispered.
The girl didn't raise her face the first time. When Jenna called her, she moved the pillow away and broke into tears. Her voice cracked like she had been crying for a while.
"No, no, Mabel," Jenna rushed to her corner, brushing her thumb on the girl's flushed cheeks. She wiped her tears that didn't stop.
"Come here," Jenna pulled her into a hug and patted. "Shh...you did nothing wrong. You did absolutely nothing wrong."
Mabel buried her face on Jenna's chest and cried. "I... I don't even know who he is...what if he doesn't come for me?" she asked, her grip tightening on Jenna's shirt.
Jenna pressed her lips and sighed. "If he didn't want you, then he wouldn't have given you a hairpin."
"Then where is he?" Mabel asked, raising her face, her eyes bloodshot with tears.
"If he wants me and gave me the hairpin, then where is he? Why am I the only one with this shame?"
Jenna inhaled tiredly, adjusting her body so she would sit down with her back resting on the bed.
"I don't know," was Jenna's reply.
Even Mabel widened her eyes, shock written all over her face. "What?"
Jenna nodded. "I came in with the mind of consoling you too, but I don't know. To be honest, I don't know if he is going to burst in through that door or not. I don't know if you've been tricked...all of this I don't have a drop of idea," she confessed, staring at her palm.
"Sometimes I just think life is as stupid as these lines on our palm. One moment we think it's special and makes us stand out, another moment it's all useless." Jenna groaned, throwing her head back to rest on the bed.
Mabel sat down too in the same position, resting her head on the bed. "I think my life is the worst."
Jenna nodded with a hum. "I agree with you," she sighed, rubbing her forehead.
"My Lady, aren't you supposed to give me hope?" Mabel asked softly, not understanding why her mistress suddenly sounded sadder than her.
Jenna exhaled. "I want to...and I am going to do everything within and out of my power to find the man, but...if people around here know it has to do with me, they probably might not help. So, I don't know what to do."
"Then tell me...how special is it to have your first time with the one you love?" Mabel asked, folding her legs, with one part hanging awkwardly because of her thick dress.
Jenna turned her head, still resting on the bed, staring at the girl. She chuckled. "Someone special? I almost died," she scoffed.
"It wasn't as I fantasized as a child, so I don't think I can tell you," Jenna remarked.
Silence returned between them again, both staring at the ceiling with words filled in their eyes.
"I'm sorry I can't say the things you want to hear, Mabel. I just know it'll hurt now, maybe more later, but then it gets less and just becomes a part of you. I don't know if that counts," Jenna blew a raspberry with her lips and sighed.
Mabel twitched her lips. "As long as My Lady doesn't abandon me, I believe I'll be fine."
"I'll never abandon you, Mabel," Jenna took the girl's hand and squeezed. "I'll protect you, I promise. And I have decided to find that man myself. Percy and—"
Mabel jumped up and shook her head. "No, not them! Especially not Henri—"
Jenna raised her face. "Why? Is there something you want to tell me?"
Mabel opened her lips to talk, but Percy and others rushed inside the room with Harriet running beside them.
"What happened to Mabel?!"