A couple of days later, Bishop decided to flex something in front of his sister.
"Sis, I got one up on you… Check the pics in my room," he said with a smug grin.
Kerry glared at him. "What the fuck are you yapping about? You didn't slap more of those half-assed, half-naked anime chick posters up, did you? You goddamn nerd. I ain't looking at that shit."
"No, they're not semi-naked or anything… Not semi-naked... THEY'RE TOTALLY NAKED!" he said with a bit too much enthusiasm. "But not anime girls. Just... pictures. Naked pictures. Like the ones you've got of my friend Chad plastered all over your wall... except mine are way better. Well... better, in my humble opinion; I think they're better..."
She blinked at him like he'd been huffing toilet cleaner fumes straight out of the bottle.
"Nothing… fucking nothing tops Chad. Not your skanky anime sluts, not your crusty pixel waifus. Jack shit comes close. Chad's a goddamn legend!"
Bishop's grin widened. "You're gonna be so jealous,little K. I've finally beaten you. My wall's got sexier pics than yours, and… no… they're not anime girls."
Kerry's eyes narrowed as it clicked. "Ohhh, you mean that internet girlfriend you've been catfishing? What, she actually sent you nudes?"
"Oh, that internet girlfriend? I dumped her... because... uh... well, her... um... pussy was too tight, and, uh, my dick is, like, way too big to fit inside it... but now I've got loads of girlfriends... many, many girlfriends... wanna see?"
"Your ass is lying. You mean your internet girlfriend dumped you for being a fucking lying catfishing creep."
She pushed herself into Bishop's room, slapped the T-Rex dinosaur over before it could roar at her, and looked around—and saw... naked pictures of women plastered all over his walls. But not just any women... these were people Kerry instantly recognised.
It wasn't random chicks—it was every K-pop goddess you could name. Blackpink's Jisoo, Jennie, Rosé, Lisa. Twice's Nayeon, Momo, Sana, and the rest. Aespa's Karina, Winter, Giselle, Ningning. Itzy's Yeji, Ryujin, and crew. NewJeans' Minji, Hanni, and Danielle. Le Sserafim's Sakura, Chaewon. Even IVE's Yujin, Wonyoung, and more. All of them, buck-naked, sprawled across his walls like some pervy collector's wet dream. Flawless petite figures, dazzling smiles, every shot looking like it was ripped from a professional studio—except, you know, naked.
Eyes bugging out and jaw damn near unhinged, Kerry gawked. "Holy fuck! Look at those bodies! Every single one of these K-pop chicks is fucking stacked! Tits, asses, curves—CRAZY, they're carved like fucking goddesses! Shit, those naked frames are straight-up perfection!"
Her voice was pure, unfiltered awe, hands flailing as she gawked, practically drooling. "Fuck me, Bishop, their bodies are so hot I can't even blink!"
He just stood there with pride, like he was showing off all his Olympic medals, Academy Awards, or Yu-Gi-Oh tournament participation trophies.
She looked closely at the nude photo of Jennie—fully naked, legs open wide on the bed, with a neatly trimmed pussy.
Kerry said, "I wonder if her stylist helps her with this trimming…"
She stared even closer and said, "These... these are not photoshopped... these are the real deal! Jeez!! And jizz!! I bet you've been having some proper massive wanks to these pictures…"
Bishop smirked and said, "I don't... a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell... or wank and tell, or however that saying goes. But I'll tell you this: there's a reason I've been holed up in my room for the last few days. Let's just say I've been... occupied in here."
Kerry's eyes drifted to the trash bin, followed by Bishop's. Their gazes flicked to the bin, practically overflowing with crusty, balled-up tissues.
And then she let out a loud, disapproving hiss through her teeth.
Bishop should've been embarrassed—but he only grinned, proud as a kid who'd just completed the rarest sticker album in the world.
"Get that smirk off your face! Did you hack their phones or some shit? Where'd you get these? Answer me! These are…"
"No... I can't hack anything... Hell, I couldn't hack into a wet paper bag. I even tried hacking into a McDonald's Happy Meal bag to steal some of the new Minecraft toys, but nope, couldn't do it, no matter how soaked I made them."
"Really?! I know what you did… You sneaky little bastard... you pulled the same shit these other assholes did to get celebrities' nudes with that infamous iCloud Fappening hack! You just phoned up, pretending to be the damn celebrity, and that dumbass Apple tech guy handed over a security confirmation code, no questions asked, no verification at all."
"No, I didn't hack anything. I will tell you exactly how I got them. When I first sent Chad's nude photos to my ex-internet girlfriend, I got nudes back, and they were super sexy nudes. I had a couple of… nice wanks to them… okay, more than 2… I am trying to be open and honest with you here."
Kerry sneered, "Yeah... I'm buying this so far... you jerked off to your fake, catfished internet girlfriend... Now, give me the rest of your bullshit story, and if I don't like how it ends, I'll fucking choke you out... and I mean it."
"No… It's not bullshit... Well, my ex-internet girlfriend kept pushing me to meet her… Ehh... Chad... I mean, BigLoad4UExpress, and she kept asking me to go on camera and jerk off for her… I got... alright, I got jealous... because all she cared about was sucking Chad's dick, not mine."
"Are you reading me an erotic web novel? Because so far... I'm as dry as a cactus."
Ummm… TMI… sis… Anyway… I thought about how horny my… ex-internet girlfriend got after seeing a simple dick pic and thought back to all the times I… never mind… I'll skip this part of the story.
Kerry lunged, slamming him against the wall with a feral growl, her fist twisting his collar so tight his face turned red. "Skip nothing, you slimy fuck!" she roared, eyes blazing like she'd torch his soul. "You spill every single detail, or I'll choke you out!"
"Alright, alright!" Bishop croaked, flailing like a fish, gasping as he clawed at her grip.
"Fuck, lemme breathe!"
Okay…. "I thought back to a time...I… I don't do this any more, I swear!!"
"Pttf!"
"I used to send dick pics to random girls on Snapchat… I tried to meet… a quota of 100 girls per day… so 100 girlfriends... girls could really, really, really love it... I mean, love me."
"So, you're sending unsolicited dick pics to girls online? Why does this not surprise me at all?"
"We all need hobbies... I guess... Anyway, most girls… actually, every girl… either threatened me or sent replies like, 'Send that thing again and I'm reporting you to the police,' or, 'Enjoy getting banned, creep,' or, 'Thanks for traumatising me, asshole,' or, 'You must be really desperate if you're sending your mouldy dick pics to strangers."
Kerry gave the biggest eye roll ever.
"I sent one of my dick pics to Becky G... and the message was shown as read... So, Becky G... the famous celebrity... the pop star... actually saw my dick!"