It takes a wise mind to write a thesis, and a chaotic one to decorate it with dwarves yelling 'stronk'.
The house was unusually quiet when I stepped in, the kind of quiet that signaled both peace and potential disaster. The scent of something vaguely edible drifted from the kitchen—Rolo's doing, no doubt. He seemed a bit nervous, which probably explained the slightly burnt edge to the bread on the table.
Alex was already halfway through his bowl of stew, hair a mess like he'd been in a wind tunnel. "You're late," he said around a mouthful. "We were starting to think you were on a date or something."
"With Mazen?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.
Alex started to look green, and he nearly choked on a chunk of carrot. "Don't even joke about that. I lost my appetite and my grip on reality."
Rolo snorted into his mug, clearly enjoying the image. "You have quite the interesting taste."
I chuckled and dropped my coat on the back of the chair. "You're just upset he didn't offer you any ancient relics or forbidden books, right?"
"Fair enough," Rolo sighed, nudging a stack of papers toward me. "Speaking of relics… Can you please look over the report?"
"I'll read it after lunch."
He blinked. "Wait, seriously?"
I was already flipping the first page open. "Seriously."
Alex looked between us. "Okay, what did I miss? Shay, reading an academic paper without a knife to his throat? Did someone cast a charm on you? Blink twice if you're possessed."
"I'm not possessed," I said, not looking up.
Alex squinted. "That's exactly what someone possessed would say."
I didn't bother responding.
"I'll ask someone professional to take a look, too," I said, already scheming. The prospect of seeing Lil again lifted my mood.
Alex narrowed his eyes. "There it is. That smirk. You are possessed."
I smiled, turning another page. Possessed? No. Just… opportunistic.
Back in my room, the afternoon sun slanted through the curtains, casting lazy golden stripes across the floor. Rolo's report sat in front of me, now covered in my very scientific annotations—by which I mean, it looked like a bored toddler had gotten hold of it during a sugar high.
There were doodles in the margins: a suspiciously muscular dwarf giving a thumbs-up and a tiny stick figure labeled "Rolo" dramatically fainting over a diagram. One of the pages had a coffee stain shaped like a grumpy dragon, which I'd thoughtfully outlined and captioned "Artifact guardian, probably."
Beside an overlong paragraph, I'd written: [This sentence fought me. I lost. Please help.]
And under one especially dense diagram, I'd added:[Is this a blueprint or a summoning circle?]
The serious notes were in there too—somewhere—usually sandwiched between funny comments. It wasn't academic, but it was honest. And if Lil saw the dragon-coffee-stain doodle and mocked me for it—well, that was half the point.
I leaned back in my chair, grabbed my phone, and tapped on Lil's number.
[You free tomorrow morning? I was thinking coffee, a little light conversation, maybe basking in my company.]
It didn't take long for her reply to come.
Trouble's Chauffeur: [Shay. I have stuff to do. You realize I don't exist solely to drink coffee with you, right?]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [I'm a busy person. I have responsibilities. Not everyone can lounge around charming people all day.]
Ouch. Not a hard no, but definitely a reluctant brush-off.
[Come on, Lil. Just half an hour. I promise no lounging, minimal charming, and I'll even let you mock my drawing skills.]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [Tempting. But I'm still going to say no.]
I stared at that message for a moment, then exhaled through my nose, amused. I tapped out my next message with a grin tugging at my lips.
[Even if I got my hands on a report on a dwarven artifact?]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [Hold on. How did you get your hands on a dwarven artifact? Did you steal it? Please tell me you didn't steal it from the Dwarf King!]
[Me? Stealing? Never!🤪]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [🙄]
[Relax, I didn't steal it.]
[I have it, yes. And one of my subjects is writing a report on it for Talambér.]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [Talambér gave you an artifact? Since when does he just hand out ancient relics like candy??]
[He didn't exactly give it to me...]
[It's more like he... lent it]
[Generously]
Trouble's Chauffeour: [Who's the subject writing the report?]
[It's a secret. Mystery adds spice.]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [I hate spice.]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [But fine. I'm coming.]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [For the report.]
Trouble's Chauffeur: [Not for you.]
[Of course. See you at 8.]
She didn't respond to that last one. But the typing bubble blinked on for a moment, then disappeared. I took that as a win.
(...)
The morning sun was barely up, but I was already staring at my closet like it was plotting against me. I tugged on a black shirt, then tossed it off. Too serious. Tried a grey one, but it was too plain. Finally settled on something blue and soft that didn't look like I slept in it, even if I technically had.
Next, I was brushing my hair with my fingers (with actual effort).
Alex was just walking past, half-eaten apple in hand, probably headed toward the kitchen and completely uninterested in whatever chaos I was up to—until he caught a glimpse of me from the corner of his eye.
He stopped mid-step. I heard it—the exact moment he froze. Then: a slow backward step, like someone rewinding a suspicious tape. His head leaned in just far enough to peek through the doorframe. "What. Are. You. Doing."
"Nothing."
"…Did you just comb your hair?"
I glanced at him. "No."
"You did. I saw you." He stepped in fully now, holding the apple like it might be needed for defense. "And you're wearing that shirt. What is happening right now?"
I turned back to the mirror. "Nothing. Go eat your apple."
He narrowed his eyes. "You never do your hair. You barely own a mirror. Who are you trying to impress?"
"Coincidences," I said.
"Uh-huh. Shay," he said, holding up a finger. "Blink twice if you've been replaced by a shapeshifter who moisturizes."
I grabbed the notes. "It's just coffee. And looking at this report."
Alex gasped dramatically, blocking the door. "So a date? I would've helped you pick an outfit! You could've worn that black one with the buttons. You look like a tragic noble in it."
I shoved him aside. "You're unbearable."
He followed me down the hall. "I know that face."
"I will throw you into a pond."
"WORTH IT."
By the time I made it to the front door, I had my coat, my notes, and the vague desire to lock Alex in a closet for the day. Unfortunately, he was still trailing after me like a very smug shadow, munching on his apple and serenading me with nonsense.
"Should I write a song?" he mused, voice sing-songy. "Something epic. No, wait, how about—'Baby, your runes light up my ley lines'? Too much?"
"I will slam this door in your face."
"Oooh, or maybe you should open with a pick-up line. Something academic. 'Is that a glyph in your pocket or are you just—'"
I opened the door. He froze mid-sentence.
Lilinette stood there with her usual grace, her eyes catching mine first—then flicking to Alex, who was wide-eyed and visibly malfunctioning. He looked like someone had paused his entire operating system.
For once in his life, he was silent.
Absolutely astonished.
I turned back to him and chuckled. "Goodbye, Alex," I said sweetly.
The door clicked shut on his stunned face.
Lilinette tilted her head toward the door, still faintly amused. "Is he alright?"
I shrugged, slipping the notes into my coat. "He was born like that. Unfixable."
"Hm." She gave a small, noncommittal nod, then casually reached out and caught my sleeve. "Well, come on then. I don't have all morning."
I barely had time to blink before the world tilted—light fractured around us in that strange, glittering shimmer that always clung to her teleportation spells—and then the house was gone. A heartbeat later, cobbled streets spread out beneath our feet, and the faint scent of roasted nuts and city dust hit me like a welcome slap.
We landed in the center of town, just a step away from the little café near the old bookshop. Sunlight streamed over the rooftops, and a breeze tugged playfully at her hair.
She let go of my sleeve with a smirk. "You're paying for the coffee."
"Very well."
We made our way to the café, greeted by the smell of fresh pastries and coffee. We found a quiet little table tucked in the corner of the café's terrace, shaded by ivy. Lil sat with her back to the street, already skimming the menu, while I placed the precious bundle of not-quite-scholarly papers between us.
"No drinks yet?" she asked, only half-mocking.
"I figured you'd interrogate me before letting me order."
She smirked and reached for the papers. "Smart boy."
She opened the folder and immediately paused. Her lips twitched. "Is that… is that a stick figure wearing a helmet labeled 'probably dwarven'?"
"…Contextual illustration," I said, with all the pride of someone pretending their doodles were art.
She chuckled—a soft, amused sound that made my monster purr a little. "And here's a diagram that looks suspiciously like a potato with wings."
"That's artistic interpretation."
She shook her head with a grin as she flipped the first page—until the grin slowly faded into something more thoughtful. Her brow furrowed slightly, eyes scanning faster, more focused.
"This is…" She leaned in, tapping the page. "Actually impressive."
She nodded, lips pursed. "It's structured like a proper academic submission. Methodical. Balanced hypotheses. Referenced theories from three different schools. He even traced the rune family through dialectal shifts." Her voice dropped into a murmur.
She flipped another page, her brows now drawn in concentration. "This bit about the harmonics in dwarven forging rituals… that's not common knowledge. And—hold on—did they cross-reference this with Talambér's old thesis on inertial resonance runes?"
I nodded and made a vague noise that might've meant possibly.
She kept reading. "This… this is smart. Like, really smart. Whoever wrote this actually knows what they're doing. Who is it?"
I gave her my most unbothered shrug. "One of my subjects."
She stared at me.
I stared back like I hadn't just called Rolo one of my subjects like some cryptic villain from a bad fantasy play.
"I'm going to order. Do you want a latte or something more… fancy?" I asked, tilting my head toward her.
I stood up with a small smile.
"Something fancy," she said. "Surprise me."
I chuckled softly. "Dangerous words."
I turned and made my way to the counter, stepping into the warm scent of roasted beans and cinnamon, but my thoughts were still at that little table. As I waited behind a pair of gossipy mages ordering way too many pastries, I glanced back.
Lil was scribbling, her expression unreadable, biting the tip of the pen between edits. Every so often, her eyes narrowed like she was mentally confronting the writer. And then she smiled.
Not at the doodles.
At the argument structure.
The barista startled me out of my reverie. "Next!"
I stepped forward. "Yeah, uh—one smoky vanilla with the gold-dusted foam and a—" I hesitated, then smirked. "—double espresso with enough caffeine to wake the dead."
The barista raised a brow but didn't ask anything.
I collected the drinks—hers delicate and elegant in a glass cup with shimmery foam, mine looking like something that might punch a hole through the veil between worlds—and made my way back to the table.
She narrowed her eyes. "So what subject? Who?"
I tilted my head and smiled. "A secret one."
"Shay."
"You said you liked mystery," I said, tasting the coffee. Ugh. Too bitter.
"I like mystery runes. Not mystery authors." She tapped the page. "This isn't just someone scribbling notes. This is someone who knows the nuances of dwarven magical linguistics. That narrows the field."
"Ah-ah," I teased, wagging a finger. "No peeking behind the curtain."
Then I proceeded to put six teaspoons of sugar into the coffee. She looked both mortified and impressed by the amount. "Is that even coffee anymore?"
"It's called taste," I said solemnly, giving it one last stir before sipping. "Still bitter. But now it also judges me slightly more."
She shook her head with a quiet snort, but the corner of her mouth twitched like she was trying not to smile. I leaned back, watching her begin her slow, surgical revision. The way she worked—efficient, focused, ruthless with commas—was kind of terrifying.
And, maybe, just a little bit hot.
Her fingers drummed on the report again, clearly not done with her interrogation.
"You do realize this paper references sources that aren't publicly indexed?" she said, eyes narrowing.
I leaned back, letting the chair creak dramatically. "Maybe I'm more resourceful than you give me credit for."
She tapped her pen thoughtfully against her lip. "So. Who wrote this?"
I sipped. Stalled. Lifted my hands in a shrug.
Lil narrowed her eyes again. "Why are you so secretive?"
"That's what makes it fun."
She rolled her eyes. "Fine. I'll play your little game. Here—" she gave back the notes. "Tell your mystery scholar they have real potential."
"You enjoyed this way too much," I muttered.
She didn't even glance up. "You handed me a rare dwarven research paper with an attached chaos comic strip. This is the best morning I've had in weeks."
Then she wanted to take a sip of her own drink. She blinked at her cup. "Is that… gold dust?"
"Only the fanciest for my favorite chauffeur," I said.
Lil picked up the cup, sniffed it cautiously, then sipped.
Her eyes widened just slightly, the faintest sound of appreciation escaping her. "Okay. That's dangerously good."
I leaned back and looked at Lil with a playful smile. "You know, if you didn't know any better, you might think this was our first date."
Lil raised an eyebrow. "And what would make you say that?"
"Just the way we're sitting here, enjoying coffee and pastries," I said with a wink. "A charming café, pleasant company—seems like the perfect setting for a first date, don't you think?"
Lil chuckled softly, shaking her head. "You certainly have a way with words, Shay. But you are still too young for me."
I laughed at Lil's comment, not missing a beat. "I suppose that's fair. But speaking of ages, I have to ask—how old are you, exactly?"
Lil's eyes twinkled mischievously. "It's considered impolite to ask a lady her age, you know."
I grinned. "Come on, you can't leave me hanging. How many centuries have you been around?"
She leaned back in her chair, sipping her coffee with a contemplative expression. "Well, let's just say I've been around long enough to appreciate both the beauty of ancient ruins and the vibrancy of modern city streets. I'm a couple of hundred years old, give or take."
"Really? That's impressive," I said, genuinely interested. "What's it like, living through so many changes?"
Lil's gaze softened as she looked out at the bustling street. "It's quite the experience. There's a certain beauty in witnessing the world evolve, seeing how people adapt and thrive. I've seen many eras come and go, and yet, there's something timeless about simple pleasures. Like sitting here in this café, enjoying a moment of peace."
I nodded, appreciating her perspective. "I can see why you'd enjoy this place."
Lil smiled, clearly content. "Sometimes, amidst all the magic, it's these simple, everyday moments that remind me of what it means to be truly alive."
I could tell that Lil genuinely appreciated the lively atmosphere.
"By the way," I said, "what do you do for fun when you're not busy teleporting around and making snide remarks?"
Lil chuckled softly. "Fun, huh? I suppose it's a mix of quiet nights and the occasional adventure. I like to keep things balanced."
"I see."
We both sat in comfortable silence for a moment, savoring the ambiance of the café and the tranquility it provided.
I broke the silence with a grin. "Given how old you are, what's one piece of wisdom you'd share with someone like me who's still figuring things out?"
Lil tilted her head slightly, her eyes thoughtful. "Patience. Sometimes the best results come from waiting and observing rather than rushing in."
I nodded, taking in her words. "That's good advice. I've learned that the hard way a few times."
"What about you, any life lessons you've learned recently?" Lil asked.
I took a thoughtful sip of my coffee before replying. "I've learned that sometimes the hardest battles are the ones fought within ourselves. I used to think that solving problems was just about confronting them head-on, but I've realized that understanding and managing myself can be just as important."
Lil raised an eyebrow. "How did you come to this realization?"
I leaned in slightly, feeling the conversation deepening. "It's been a process of understanding that I am a monster. Violence's part of me. I used to think that if I could just suppress it, everything would be fine. But now I see that I need to accept it and find a way to integrate it rather than fight against it."
Lil's gaze softened, a look of genuine understanding in her eyes. "Coming to terms with one's inner demons is one of the most challenging but rewarding journeys."
I nodded, appreciating her insight. "Exactly. You know, if every day were as delightful as this coffee date with you, I'd say the future looks a lot brighter."
Lil's lips curved into a faint smile, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Flattery and coffee—quite the combination you've got there. But remember, I'm not exactly here to be your... personal cheerleader."
I leaned in slightly, my grin widening. "I'm not asking for a cheerleader. Just someone who might share a few more moments like this with me."
She raised an eyebrow, her expression remaining playfully skeptical. "And you think you're up to the task of keeping me entertained?"
I chuckled softly. "Challenge accepted. I promise to keep things engaging."
She shook her head with a smile. Lil's smile softened as she looked around at the café. "Well, I have to admit, you've managed to make this encounter quite pleasant. I can't say that happens often."
I took a sip of my coffee, savoring the moment. "I'm glad to hear that. It's been a nice break. Maybe we can do it again sometime."
Lil glanced at her watch, then back at me with a hint of a smile. "Maybe. We'll see. I'm not one to make promises easily, but I'll keep the offer in mind."
I stood up, extending a hand. "Until next time, then?"
Lil took my hand, her grip firm yet gentle. "Until next time."
We exchanged one last smile before she headed towards the exit. I watched her go. With that, I turned and made my way out of the café, the monster still purring in me as if he were satisfied. As I stepped into the sunlight, I felt a bit lighter.
And just like that, my last day out faded into a three-week hermit saga.