The Broth Titan's shadow swallowed the courtyard whole. Servants screamed as noodle stems lashed through the air, snatching up anything edible including the castle gardener's prized cabbages.
Evangeline clung to her father's cloak, her pacifier vibrating like a trapped hornet. The prophecy mark on her wrist burned hotter with each slurping roar from the Titan.
"Bleh!" she shrieked, pointing at the monstrosity.
Translation: "Who left the cosmic ramyeon unattended?!"
Aunt Seraphina flipped a gold coin between her fingers, eyeing the Titan with professional disdain.
"Back in my day, we just stabbed eldritch horrors. None of this *gourmet apocalypse nonsense."
Duke Cassian is still wobbly from broth possession.
"Got a cutlass big enough for that?"
She grinned.
"No. But I've got this." From her coat, she produced a rusted soup ladle engraved with glowing runes.
Lucien squinting his eyes observed the thing his Aunt pulled out.
"Is that… the Holy Ladle of Saint Miso?"
"Stole it from a temple. Obviously." Seraphina replied with a smug face.
Ebony crouched beside Whiskerton on the battlements, her fur bristling as the Titan's noodly fingers crushed a guard tower.
"We'll never win. That thing ate three of your knights in one bite." Ebony declared while looking at the noodles wrecking havoc.
Whiskerton licking his paw replied nonchalantly.
"Correction temporarily inconvenienced them. Reginald's armor will eventually digest."
Below, Sir Loin rolled valiantly toward the Titan, only to bounce off its ankle like a pebble.
"…We're doomed." Ebony shrieked.
"Oh, hush. The baby's thinking." Whiskerton replied.
Evangeline's pacifier glowed white-hot. The Titan recoiled, its broth bubbling violently where the light touched.
"Darling, whatever you're planning—" asked her daughter with great worry.
Evangeline chucked the pacifier like a grenade.
It arced through the air and landed directly in the Titan's mouth.
For one terrible second, silence.
Then the Titan exploded in a shower of noodle shrapnel and soy sauce.
The courtyard resembled a poorly stocked ramen shop. Servants submerged through knee-deep broth, fishing out dazed knights and the occasional carrot.
Lucien with his soggy ledger in hand reported to his father.
"Casualty report. One pacifier. Three cabbages. And somehow, Knight Reginald is still alive."
Reginald from inside a noodle cocoon exclaimed.
"I've seen hell. It tastes… earthy."
Aunt Seraphina tossed the Holy Ladle to Evangeline, who waved it enthusiastically.
"Kid's got potential. Once she stops drooling on the relics."
Deep in the forest, Gerard stirred a new cauldron, this one filled with black instant ramyeon packets.
Gerard cackles as he stirs.
"No one defeats the Brotherhood of the Broth! NO ONE!"