It wasn't all perfect when I wanted to. I failed many times, but I tried to regain what I had lost each time. It seems that friendships cannot be repaired in a short time, regardless of our efforts. Ever since I know myself I've been strong and I see everything much more mature and I realize when someone lies to me. I recognize her lie by her face, by the way, I blink, wanting to tell me she won't let me guess the truth in them.
I disappointed my friends or other people intervened between us who took my place in a flash. Suddenly I met someone new and told him I couldn't lose anyone else because I had just gone through a breakup that made me suffer. We have seen how hard it is to get over it, but it never comes completely over because their memory will always be alive in our minds.
We can just talk to them from time to time and see how they are, but I tried not to ask them personal things. That would have meant forming a new connection, and at that point, it would have been too much for me. Usually, people don't really see me. They think I don't care, I forgot, but it's not true. I can laugh and cry at the same time.
Friendships are complicated and at the moment a serious one would be for me a dream come true after so long. Maybe I'll find it at some point. It's natural, isn't it?